...Mike. --> Sessions --> Archives"

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

~Ignorance~

Ignorance annoys me. When I see it in myself, it shames me. When I see it in others, it bothers me, but I tell myself that it's alright. But when I see ignorance spread from one person to another, particularly in the form of 'sound advice', it angers me.

Why is that? Why does it bother me so much? When one person is ignorant, I'm okay with that, and I believe a person has the right to be ignorant, whether it is by choice or not. But when I see ignorance and misinformation multiplied as one person passes it onto another as wisdom or, dare I say, truth, it bothers me to no end.

It bothers me that it bothers me. Indeed, even the way I wrote the above paragraph reveals several attitudes and biases I hold, and I've made some assumptions and insinuations about 'the ignorant'. I wonder then, am I driven by a dedication to the expression of truth and nothing but the truth at all times? And if that is the case, who am I to say I know what truth is? Maybe my paradigm of truth is too narrow, and I am unfairly applying it to others? Or maybe it's a pride thing. In reaching out and grasping the opportunity to shoot someone down for being 'wrong', perhaps I see the opportunity to elevate myself above them?

I've come to understand that I'm just a jerk most of the time.

SEE YOU, SPACE COWBOY... ~ 11:02 PM (0) comments

Monday, July 18, 2005

~A toast to my brother~

My brother Andrew flew out from Toronto again on Saturday night to continue building a new life in Hong Kong, while I was 500 klicks away shooting a wedding, and I wish I could have been there. While we have no blood relation, but some things are thicker than blood, and Andrew is more family to me than anyone in my family.

No one has ever seen me at both my best and my worst, not even a glimpse, but Andrew's seen it in spades. Looking back at the flood of memories, it's hard to believe how much we've been through in the last few years and how far we've come. Watching Andrew leave for HK the first time in December was one of the hardest moments of my life, and I know there was no way I could shield the pain I felt behind a face of stoicism that I've grown so accustomed to. I've gotten used to hard goodbyes since then, and as he flew out this time, I had happy assurance that time and distance can never extinguish true fellowship founded on the firmest of Foundations.

Andrew, I know you're reading this. Forgive the premature nature of this (it's wedding season), but I want you to know that if I had to choose a best man, it'd probably be you. Not only because of who you've been in my life, but also because if the wedding guests try to liquor me up, I know you'll take the hits for me, drink like a fish, and still be sober enough to watch my back.

For Bonnie, Tsui, and the rest of Hong Kong, I hope you know how lucky you are that he's chosen to settle there for the foreseeable future. You are truly blessed to have him.

This JD & Coke's for you...cheers, brother.

SEE YOU, SPACE COWBOY... ~ 7:56 PM (2) comments

Saturday, July 16, 2005

~Breathe Deep. Here comes #3...~

Wedding shoot #3. Deep breath...here we go.

Wedding #2 was last week, and it didn't go too badly. Even still, combined with other drama I won't talk about, I was so tired afterwards, and it took over a day for the stress to all bleed away. The couple are going to be on their honeymoon for the next three weeks, so I've got plenty of time to prep their photos for them, and for the last week I haven't even wanted to look at them, so I've yet to give them a full review, much less sort and edit them.

Things for tomorrow look to be a little less complicated, and with venues like McGill and Old Montreal, good shots won't be a problem. The church itself will be a little dark, and a little cramped, and we won't have much time to shoot on location, but it should be good. I'm just happy that I get to take another trip (free!) to Montreal again, and I'm sure to bring back lots of sesame seed bagels and Big Apple apple pies (but no smoked meat; I've had enough for year already).

When it comes to shooting weddings, I'm trying to learn to relax and let it come to me. For such a lazy person, I'm actually very driven with a streak of perfectionism. I have a very all-or-nothing work ethic (too much nothing most of the time =P), so when it comes to professionalism and delivering, I tend to go all out and exhaust myself to produce something I'd be proud of. But part of the catch is that I'm never happy with my work either, so I just keep pushing myself. I'm glad tomrorow's schedule is more relaxing, especially in the morning, giving me plenty of time to prepare, focus, and wind down a bit before the action starts. I've got to learn to just go with the flow and enjoy the ride.

SEE YOU, SPACE COWBOY... ~ 3:37 AM (1) comments

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

~120th post!~

Bloggers says that this is my 120th post! Surely, that's a noteworthy milestone.

I don't really have much to write about...except:

The Jamiroquai album is growing on me, and that's definitely a good thing. At least it's not like John Mayer's "Clarity", which actually grew off me (as in the more I listened to it, the less I liked it). The only track that I have to skip over every time now is "Love Blind"...the droning, undefined bass just drives me crazy.

I'm physically exhausted. Two weekends of crazy sleep schedules in a row isn't helping.

I've got photos to be processed backed up the wazoo...and you never want to go anywhere near the wazoo.

I've had at least 5 blog entries I've been meaning to write, but I just never get around to them. It's really quite frustrating.

Mike, Andrew and I were talking last night about, oh, let's say 'those not quite so old as us' and decided sometimes it's just better to close your eyes and pretend you see, hear, and know nothing. Because really, in the big cosmic piture, none of it all matters anyway.

SEE YOU, SPACE COWBOY... ~ 2:10 PM (0) comments

Friday, July 08, 2005

~Groovified~

This is for Jon "Bhattface" Sy. Alright you hoebag, here's my list =P

Tracks I like:
01. Feels Just Like It Should - Jamiroquai meets Lenny Kravitz. Still groovy as hell though.
02. Dynamite - Who'da thunkit? But I love disco grooves. You can't stop that bass...you just can't stop it.
03. Seven Days In Sunny June - Wicked acoustic intro, groovy as hell. Evokes images of an acid trip on a sunny summer day in 1973.
05. Starchild - Vintage Jamiroquai. Great grooves.
07. Talulah - // I got this thing / Girl I wanted to say to you / Talulah I'm missing you / Baby can't you stop that plane / Turn it around / I still love you babe / Tell the captain that I'm to blame / I'm to blame //
This track is snick, I love it. There's so much good about it.
09. World That He Wants - Jamiroquai does slow well, and I like it.
11. Hot Tequila Brown - Not outstanding, but I'd let it spin in the background.
12. Time Won't Wait - Great grooves.

Tracks I'm not so hot on:
04. Electric Mistress - The slap and pop bass almost got me, but no, this won't find rotation on my playlist.
06. Love Blind - No hook to really grab me. Love the little interlude in the middle though.
08. (Don't) Give Hate A Chance - Just not my style.
10. Black Devil Car - ditto.

Overall, I'm feeling only so-so on this album. I think "Travelling Without Moving" and "Funk Odyssey" were much stronger efforts.

SEE YOU, SPACE COWBOY... ~ 11:15 AM (2) comments

~What's Going On?~

Mother, mother
There's too many of you crying
Brother, brother, brother
There's far too many of you dying

You know we've got to find a way
To bring some love in here today

Father, father
We don't need to escalate
War is not the answer
For only love can conquer hate

We've got to find a way
To bring a little understanding here today

Picket lines and picket signs
Don't punish me with brutality
Talk to me so you can see

What's going on?
What's going on?
What's going on?

Mother, mother
Everybody thinks we're wrong
But who are they to judge us
Simply because our hair is long?

You know we've got to find a way
To bring a little understanding today

Picket lines and picket signs
Don't punish me with brutality
Talk to me so we can see

What's going on?
What's going on?
What's going on?

~ Marvin Gaye, 1939-1984. The man died 21 years ago, and the song written 34 years ago, but it still holds true. When will we learn?

SEE YOU, SPACE COWBOY... ~ 1:48 AM (0) comments

Thursday, July 07, 2005

~Drama drama drama~

I've been surfing through blogs tonight, catching up a bit on people I don't usually follow. It occurs to me, and this applies especially to the younger bloggers out there, that we live in such dramatic fashion. (Y'all can figure out who I'm talking to =P) There's just so much drama in our lives! One wonders how, in their short lives, they've managed to come so close to perfecting the Greek tragic formula so many times.

Could I suggest, mayhap, that sometimes a Monte Cristo No.2 is just a Monte Cristo No.2?

Sometimes, you gotta let some $&%@! slide.

SEE YOU, SPACE COWBOY... ~ 3:30 AM (0) comments

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

~Psychology~

Psychology is not what most people think it is.

Despite the common misconception, psychology is really just a probabilistic science that says if you possess this trait, or this background, or this job, or this relationship, you are more likely to do this, that or the other. Psychology is not about a guy in an office with a couch nailing down exactly who you are, telling you things about you that you don't already know, or predicting how your life is going to turn out. It's not ESP, it's not magic, it's not about explaining how you are a product of your past experiences.

It's not about fixations on symbols of sexuality which are either too repressed or not repressed enough. Freud was essentially a quack, despite the great good he did the field of study. His research population was somewhat skewed (middle-aged upper-class women with obvious (emotional) scars of abuse), and his theory a watered-down version of his original one...which was that these women had suffered abuse at the hands of fathers, uncles and brothers, most of whom were his colleagues or in positions of power in society. Accusing most of the Victorian upper-classmen of abusing their charges would be somewhat disruptive, wouldn't it?

Psychologists pay homage to Freud, give the man his props, but give his theories no real respect. Jung's theories find a little bit more of a welcome, but not much more so. The personality tests out there are little more than the pipedream of pop-psychology, with little validity. The same goes for 'tests' that tell you what career would fit you (a la Myers-Briggs), who your significant other is, and yes, even those who tell you what your spiritual gifts are. (Did you really think you could discover those by filling in a Scan-Tron?)

I suppose I write this partly out of frustration from assumptions and misconceptions people have about my field of study and, by extension, about me. I am no more empathetic, or understanding, or sensitive because I did a major in psychology. I don't understand you any better just because I hold a BA in Psych. Finding out who people are, getting under their skin, and understanding how our lives effect each others' is still done the old-fashioned way: you interact, you listen, you learn.

Psychology is about research and statistics, and little else. I can tell you that language is the seat of early learning, that your short term memory consists of 5-9 units which can consist of subunits within each, and that behaviours like group-think and self-fulfilling prophecies tend to arise in social situations.

I cannot, however, tell you who you are, what you think, what you feel, or why. There is no magic key to this. The real art of knowing people is still found in being a part of people, and nothing will ever replace that.

Not even my psych degree.

SEE YOU, SPACE COWBOY... ~ 12:45 AM (0) comments